Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The GREAT Divide!

Women, particularly feminists, leave no opportunity to point out what a bane, men are to society and how, with human cloning becoming successful, men can be just thrown off the face of Mother Earth! But there is a further divide... in the South of India, people feel that North Indian Men (NIM) - and not men in general - are the bane of society. They are supposed to be uncouth, uncultured and God's gift to womankind. And for the South Indian Men, (SIM), every person who has been born and brought up towards the north of the Vindhyas, is a North Indian (Yes, us Mumbaikars as well!!! :) )

Let's put things in perspective : there's no denying that in the 'women-safe' city of Mumbai, a few years ago, on New Year's night, women were molested by a mob in full public view with media around. But to counter that is the Mangalore pub assault episode, when the activists of Sri Rama Sene barged into a pub and violently beat up the girls present there in the name of preserving Indian culture.

Can we really segregate and accuse one section of the population with such 'henious' crimes while absolving the other group in the same breath, just by virtue of the states of birth / growing up / residence? But truth be told - NIM are far more crass and openly rough and vulgar than the SIM. The most perverted, double-meaning jokes, am sure, originated in the northern part of the country and although I am not judgemental about them (having laughed at them with as much gusto as my NIM & SIM friends), they can get lewd and uncomfortable for the feeble hearted. And not to forget the evergreen punch-lines - 'Kya maal / item / bomb / body hai'; 'Aa chalti hai kya'; They not only whistle, but also make obscene gestures and pass lewd comments. Whether a girl is of eighteen or a woman in her 50s, these men shower there love and affection on everyone.

This is what I read in a site which caters to Western Women visiting India - particular advice for North India while South India was rated much more laid back, friendly, and respectful :

- Learn to ignore everyone around you unless you have a specific reason to speak with someone.

- Don't meet people's eyes - especially men.

- Don't chat very much with random guys. Indian women don't do that and neither do they look at men. In fact most Indian women completely ignore the presence of men and just go about their business.

- Maintain your distance from any man - very young to very old. At least three to four feet. That's how much space Indian women maintain between themselves and an unrelated male.

- Don't wear clothes that expose the shoulders, that are tight across the chest, don't expose legs, no strappy dresses, etc. Salwars or just pants and a long cotton top are comfortable and appropriate.

- If anyone asks you about a boyfriend or husband, say yes, you are married for years and he is in Mumbai or somewhere else and you are visiting friends in whichever town you happen to be in. Or just act completely deaf when the topic comes up. Most Indian women do not answer personal questions and keep quiet to indicate that the question was no appropriate.

- Learn a few words of the local language like help, water, toilet, etc. When in doubt about something, ask another woman or a couple.

- If you will wear salwar kameez (that "Punjabi suit" you'll see women wearing -- baggy pants, baggy shirt and a scarf which is not optional -- you'll give people the silhouette that they are used to seeing and will avoid a lot of unwanted attention from the bold and sex-starved men who will approach you.

- You should also avoid being alone on dark streets at night, and private contact with strange men. Just because they are wearing shirt and trousers instead of a longhi doesn't mean a man has the capacity for the sort of friendship you and I are used to from Western men -- so don't expect that.

- Meet cyberpals in public, in daylight if possible... always. Even at home, this is kind of like saying "don't take candy from strangers" but every once in a while we need that reminder.

- If you're lost or need to know what time it is, ask the nearest woman. Her husband will answer, but direct your conversation at HER.
(WOW!!! This is enlightening!)

- If someone touches you, slap him! Scream "pervert"! Take off your shoe and threaten him with that! But that's a last resort -- better to avoid those situations when possible.

- If you are on a train and someone asks if they may please sit on your berth while you sleep -- tell him that you know he would never want anyone to ask his sister that same thing and to forget that idea.

All this being said, you will have a more difficult time in North India than in the South of India. North Indian men are more aggressive towards women - not just foreigners, other Indians too.

Perhaps a burkah would be the answer to our woes in India!!!

But guess what - although the NIMs win this hands down, guess, burkhas are not able to protect these women -

Guatemala, where an impoverished female underclass faces domestic violence, rape and torture. An epidemic of gruesome unsolved murders has left hundreds of women dead, some of their bodies left with hate messages.

Pakistan, women are gang-raped as punishment for men’s crimes.

Somalia, a vicious civil war has put women, who were the traditional mainstay of the family, under attack. In a society that has broken down, women are exposed daily to rape, dangerously poor health care for pregnancy, and attack by armed gangs.

Nepal Early marriage and childbirth exhaust the country’s malnourished women, and one in 24 will die in pregnancy or childbirth. Daughters who aren’t married off may be sold to traffickers before they reach their teens. Widows face extreme abuse and discrimination if they’re labeled bokshi, meaning witches.

Mali, where few women escape the torture of genital mutilation, many are forced into early marriages, and one in 10 dies in pregnancy or childbirth.

Afghanistan More than half of all brides are under 16, and one woman dies in childbirth every half hour. Domestic violence is so common that 87 per cent of women admit to experiencing it. But more than one million widows are on the streets, often forced into prostitution.

Daughters of Shame by Jasvinder Sanghera outlines in painful detail the horrific stories of women abused and suffering... 'I listen to those stories -- told by women who have been drugged, beaten, imprisoned, raped and terrorised within the walls of the homes they grew up in. I listen and I am humbled by their resilience', she says. It is a long drawn battle - one which is being fought in various parts of the world, behind closed doors and in open grounds, in darkness and in light, in public view and in private; it is a battle without ammunition but the wounds are equally deep, the cries deeply painful and abuse and death as real... Every defeat in this war must be deeply mourned and every victory celebrated and recounted deftly and without apology.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Rishta - Unka Hamaari Peedha Se - Part 2

Following the mail exchanges, here's another contribution to the Peedha, by - well, let's just call him - The Sun...

Sab ko hai apne apne trackeron se pyaar!!

Kartey rahtey hain hum pur nirantar atyaachaar!!

Attrition, Goal setting, PMS yeh to ab hain hamaare sah parivaar

But iss chakkar mein kaise bhool gaye voh hiring trackers ka avtaar..

Jo hasaatey rulaatey bhagaatey tadpaatey..

Kabhi business to kabhi region se dilvaayey queries or formats ki bauchaar!!

Mere pyaare HR ke mitron..

Kar rahey hain hum log apnee strategic competencies build..

Employee engagement in this day and age is

Very much like a band aid while Taliban and NATO are getting killed..

Hai hamaara apna nirantar sapnaa..

Hiring ka mantra to hai raat din japnaa.

Stambhit aur bhramit ho gaye;

Krodhagni mein jala ke..

Hamarey human engagement ke basics ko hila ke..

In trackeron ne kiya hamey ek baar phir dharashayee..

Humaree saasein hain ghabrayee..

Himmat hai sharmaayee..

Data compiling ability hai hadbadai..

Ab aap hi bole.. hum karein ki na karien compile!!

Yeh sab kartey, jeetey martey na kiya kuch bhi itnaa enjoy..

Jitna Ms. B & Ms. Dewdrop ke poems ka dhamaaka.

Thakengey, rukengey ladengey marenge chahey jo tracker maango voh bharengey..

Bus in return kabhi kabhi yeh poems denaa bhej..

Taaki hum bhi ruk ruk kar dukh dukh kar hotey rahein encourage!!

Kyon bhai... theek hain na for our vintage??

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Tag 4 - 100 things

March seems to be the Tag-Month for me...

Here goes another one...

1. Last beverage: Mountain Dew
2. Last phone call: My Mom
3. Last text message: Some SMS from Airtel on Hello Tunes!
4. Last song you listened to: Yeh Dilli Hai Mere Yaar (Delhi 6)
5. Last time you cried: Today - shed exactly one tear... :)

6. Dated someone twice: Yes
7. Been cheated on? : Yes
8. Kissed someone & regretted it? Err...hmm...mmm?? ahem.... NO...hehe..
9. Lost someone special? Yes
10. Been depressed? Yes
11. Been drunk and threw up? No (and am right down proud of it ;) )

12. White
13. Red
14. Black
15. Blue

16. Made new friends: Yes
17. Fallen out of love: Yes
18. Laughed until you cried: Tonnes of times!!!
19. Met someone who changed you: Yes
20. Found out who your true friends were: Yes
21. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes

22. Kissed anyone on your friend's list: Yes :)
23. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: Everyone
24. How many kids do you want to have: Two
25. Do you have any pets: No but I would absolutely love a Labrador
26. Do you want to change your name: No
27. What did you do for your last birthday: Had the most awesome dinner @ The Taj, followed by a midnight cake-cutting session and a surprise gift...
28.What time did you wake up today: 2pm - yes, you read it right... 2 in the afternoon!!! :)
29. What were you doing at midnight last night: blogging
30. Name something you CANNOT wait for : People to call / meet friends
31. Last time you saw your father: 1 month and 2 days ago...
32. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: Nothing much really...
33. Most visited web page: My blog :) / Facebook / GMail

34. Name: Ummm... Dewdrop :)
35. Nicknames: Ummm... let's just say, Mischief / Sunshine
36. Zodiac sign: Sagittarius
37. Male or female or transgender : Female
38. Elementary: Some convent school in Mumbai
39. Colleges: Yes... have attended & cleared
40. Hair color: Currently brown with highlights
41. Long or short: Shoulder-length
42. Height: Am taller than the height of the average Indian Woman
43. Do you have a crush on someone? Yes...
44. Ever been in love? Yes...
45. Piercings? Pierced ears
46. Tattoos? No
47. Righty or lefty: Righty
48. First surgery: None
49. First piercing: At the age of 3 I guess
50. First best friend: Hrishikesh
51. First sport you loved: and still love - swimming
52. First pet : Never had one :(... but made pets of a lot of doggies
53. First vacation: As far as I can remember, Kolkata / Delhi
54. First concert: SPICMACY - tabla by Zakir Hussein
55. First crush: Hmmm... aah... well... ho - hum... well, let's just call him - my sweetheart!

56. Eating: Nothing
57. Drinking: Paani
58. I'm about to: Play 'Lost Cities' with hubby...
59. Listening to: Masakaali (Delhi 6)
60. Waiting for: Trip to Andaman's for my diver course

61. Want kids? Yes, absolutely
62. Want to get married? Am married... and happy! :)
63. Careers in mind? currently HR professional, later a trainer / professor / consultant / psychiatrist

64. Lips or eyes: Eyes
65. Hugs or kisses: Hugs (and will not mind if it leads to kisses ;) )
66. Shorter or taller: Taller
67. Older or Younger: Older
68. Romantic or spontaneous: Romantically spontaneous!
69. Nice stomach or nice arms: Nice Arms
70. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive
71. Hook-up or relationship: Relationship
72. Trouble maker or hesitant: Hesitant

73. Kissed a stranger: Nope
74. Lost glasses/contacts: Don't use either
76. Broken some one's heart: Yes :(
77. Had your own heart broken: Yes :( :(
78. Been arrested: Nope
79. Turned someone down: Yes
80. Cried when someone died: Yes
81. Liked a friend that is a girl? I LOVE all my girlfriends...

81. Yourself: Yes... Completely and unshakably
82. Miracles: Yes, they are what keeps life interesting
83. God: Yes
84. Love at first sight: Yes :) completely...
85. Heaven: Well, am not sure about Heaven - Hell funda - don't think about it much
86. Santa Claus: Yes... Ho Ho Ho!
87. Kiss on the first date? Let's see...hmmm... :) Yes
88. Angels: Yes... they are around me always in the form of my family - n - friends!
89. Devils: Yes... :) every thing has an ante as well

90. Is there one person you want to be with right now? Yes.Yess.Yesss.
91. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? No
92. Wanted to kill someone ever? Yes. (Well, never mind who!!!)
93. Among you blog mates, whom would you like to kiss? Nope!
94. Committed a blunder and regretted later? Yes... Number of times!
95. Wanted to steal you friend's boyfriend / girlfriend? : Nope, was always happy with my choice!

96. White: Churdidaar
97. Black: Jeans
98. Red: Bling bangles
99. Pink: Chiffon Saree
100. Posting this as 100 Truths? Yes. :)

This tag is open for anyone to take up!!!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Rishta - Unka Hamaari Peedha Se

Warning : This post is going to be in Hindi (and I'll translate it for the benefit of all).

The Background : In my company, there are multiple trackers that we use extensively, to track progress on deadlines, update of recruitment numbers etcetera. Off late, my colleague and self have been creating a number of trackers for certain projects that we have rolled-out, much to the peedha (pain) of my counterparts in HR. The West Team decided (in all humour) to put their peedha in words today...

Reproduced below is the poem they sent to us (South Team) :

Jab se Dewdrop ka Induction (in HR) hua hai,

Pre-inductees ka FORCED business interaction shuru hua hai.

(From the time DewDrop has joined HR, new recruits have been forced to have interactions with Businesses)

Pehle jab kabhi hote the Open house;

Aur Business se HR milta tha jaise someone meeting an ex-spouse,

(Previously, during Open Houses, HR used to meet Business akin to meeting an ex-spouse)

Par ab aalam aisa hai –

Ki HR aur Business ka milna – arranged match se peedith, maa-baap se forced;

Kisi ladki/ladke kii potential se lagaatar meeting jaisa hai.

(But now, the situation is such that HR meets business akin to those girls / guys who are pained by arranged marriages and are forced by parents to meet their potential life-partners)

Jaise shaadiyon ka season saal bhar aata jaata hai,

Thanks to apni Dewdrop, – waise hi panchang jaise ab interaction calendar with THICK PPTs aata hai.

(Marriage season comes throughout the year; similarly, Dewdrop sends us interaction calendars and thick PPTs)

Har baar hum wonder karte hain,

Par naa chaahate hue bhi interaction tracker dekar surrender karte hain.

Par ek khayaal phir bhi dil mein har baar aata hai,

Itni globe maarne ki kshamata aur ppt banaane ka patience bhagwaan Dewdrop ko kahan se deta hai.

(We wonder each time but even though we don't want it, we fill trackers and send them across; however we wonder where does Dewdrop get the potential to give such global gnyaan and patience to make PPTs)


Yahiin nahin hota khatam yeh kissa,

Aaisi aadatein acquired aur communicable hoti hain-apni South HR Team proof hai iska.

Dewdrop agar performance management ki hai Devi,

toh not far lagging behind is D – our V ‘MAHA’sveta devi.

Kyunki Dewdrop ka atyaachaar toh spurts mein – saal mein ruk ruk kar aata hai,

D ka V toh poora saal hi hamein marwaata hai ( yeh dekho aayi ek aur mail).

(It doesn't end here. If Dewdrop is the Goddess of Performance Management then D is the MahaDevi of V - an HR engagement initiative; Dewdrop's torture comes in spurts but D's V is there to haunt us throughout the year (Look, here comes another mail from D!!!)

Abhi kahan chal diye’ – rukiye rukiye’

Who kaise bhool sakte hain hum,

Who wahi atyaachar joh hum par karte’ hai (now not available) SHBniam.

(Wait guys, where are you'll off to... How can we forget the person who used to torture us so much - SHB)

De dana dan mails aur database cleanup aur ab joining process/ exit process/ confirmation process…wagerah wagerah cleanup mein pehle phansaata hai,

Aur us paar who hans hans kar zor zor se ….aisa lagta hai hamara mazaak hii udaata hai ( karo karo abhi aur bhi hai…types)

Bhai soch soch kar ghabraate hain hum,

Kahaan se laate hain yeh sitam karna ka itna dum.

Hum peediton ka toh kya hai – jaise kaise karte hain,

Par yeh South team ke praani ek cheez toh definitely deserve kartehain…….

(We wonder where do they get such powers to torture us so... we poor souls have no way out except to give in and do the job but the South Team definitely deserve one thing - The Oscars!)


To this, I responded thus (On the music of Rock On's Meri Laundry Ka Ek Bill...) :

Humare Trackers Ke Lists,

Badle mein humein milte hain Fists

Bosses Ke Data Numbers,

Jo ban jaate hain Trackers

Pichhle mahinon mein humne aaplogon ko sataye

Kabhi Khud Pe Hanse Aap

Aur Kabhi Khud Pe Roye…

(Our list of trackers only invite the angst from other teams... Our bosses' quantitative targets get converted into trackers... In the last few months, we have pained you'll a lot...At times you'll must have laughed on yourselves, and at times cried)

Kaise Bhulein Aaj ka Din Jo Aaya

Kisi Ne West Team ka dimaag Khulwayaa

Kaisa Pal Tha Jis Pal Unhonein taareefon bhara mail humein paadvaya…

(How can we forget today when the West team sent across their mail full of praise for us)

Humari itni si intejaa hai aapse…

Humari bhi pareshaniyan samaja kijiye…

Hum bhi trackers ke bhoj se dooooooob rahen hain…

(Our only request to all is to understand that we too fill the trackers we create and are drowning in them as well)

Ye toh trailer hain doston…

Aap logon ke Hosh Bhi Kho jayenge…

Dil Bhi Kho jayenge

Kabhi Khud Pe Hansenge Aap,

Aur Kabhi Khud Pe Royenge

(This is just the trailer, my friends... )

Trackers ki bauchaar abhi baaki hain mere yaaron…
(On the lines of SRK's dialogue in OSO - Picture abhi baaki hain mere doston)!!!
(It will rain trackers soon, my friends!!! )

Friday, March 20, 2009

Honest Scrap Award

I've just been awarded the Honest Scrap Award by Amal. And just like him, I'm very excited about my first e-award online! Thanks Amal!

I need to fulfill some requirements before I can pass this along to another fellow blogger. To quote from Amal’s blog, here are the requirements:

'This award is bestowed upon a fellow blogger whose blog’s content or design is, in the giver’s opinion, brilliant.

When accepting this auspicious award, you must write a post bragging about it, including the name of the misguided soul who thinks you deserve such acclaim, and link back to the said person so everyone knows she/he is real. Choose a minimum of seven (7) blogs that you find brilliant in content or design. Or improvise by including bloggers who have no idea who you are because you don’t have seven friends. Show the seven random victims’ names and links and leave a harassing comment informing them that they were prized with Honest Weblog. Well, there’s no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon. List at least ten (10) honest things about yourself. Then pass it on!'...

I have, in Tag Two, jotted down 25 things about myself... and believe you me, they are all honest!!! :)

But to honour this award, let me write down 10 more honest things about me (and since the rule involves bragging, I'll quote some of the things my friends have written about me at various occasions) :
1. She is one of a kind who makes you wonder if anything at all can be wrong with the world! Nothing can ever stop this ever-so-optimistic and order-freak once she sets her mind on something!

2. Always smiling and always on the go, she is an epitome of sincerity and being on time.

3. She is one hell of a conversationalist who also loves dishing out sound advice.

4. What I like most about her is, the unique ability to view things in an unbiased way,being blatantly frank and yet her very own caring self...

5. Lots of laughs n a naughty smile that keeps u guessing what’s on her mind, n possibly the only one I have ever known to live life by her very own terms!!! If life could be called a roller coaster ride, having her along sure makes the ride worthwhile!!!.

6. The first thing that you'll notice about her is her smile! She comes into the room and flashes that close-up smile of hers and everyone's got to notice her at once (you attention seeker you!!!!). Shez so chirpy she lights up the room with her smile that reaches her eyes...

7. When she's excited, I really start to wonder where she gets all that energy from. She'll simply go on and on and on...really luv her for that!!! She's tough on the outside but inside she's a real softy...

8. She's someone everyone can relate to...and even if you've just met her, you feel like you know her for ages. A person with whom you can share absolutely everything, she's one of the bestest fundooest most TP person I know... a true blue bong who cant sing rabindra sangeet as good as sidey govinda nos....

9. She appeared in Page 3 of Telegraph once!!!

10. Frank, straightforward, matter of fact, simple, having a zest for life, perennially happy... GOOD PERSON!!

There, I've done it... completely, whole-heartedly (and shamelessly!!! ;) ) bragged about myself...

Now, to keep the award going, I would like to pass it on to the following :

Sayesha : I love the way she articulates her thoughts - very simply and genuinely... love her blog!

Neha : She's a wonderful person and I love her free spirit...

Greatbong : Love his blogposts - the sarcasm, the wit, the humour... downright honest!

Mehreen : I find her blogposts straight from the heart...

Meera : Cute Blog

Akanksha : Completely floored by some of her 55-fictions!

Pri : I like the way she thinks!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

The G-Spot!

So, I finally hit the G-spot today! Hmmm, before you imaginative minds jump with joy on thinking about the contents of this post, let me make it clear - I am talking about Gossip!

Now, why am I in this gossipy mood today? Actually, am not! Something happened in office today morning (won't put in the gory details), and there I was pouring my bleeding, tortured heart out to a colleague. And surely, it was not one of those 'Did-you-see-her-bling-where-does-she-get-her-accessories-from' gossip. It was the complete reverse - griping, gloomy, grouchy, grumbling gossip.

And as I was in the process of talking, I suddenly went detached from my being and started noticing what I was doing, very neutrally (doesn't happen very often with me - I guess I was tortured way too much today for my brain to do this!).

Firstly, I noticed, I was gossiping - I mean I was doing exactly what the Webster's dictionary defines gossiping as - a person who habitually reveals personal or sensational facts about others / rumor or report of an intimate nature / a chatty talk.

Next, what I was saying was not one of those harmless, light conversations but had a complaint underneath. And (I am smiling indulgently as I write this!), in my complaint, I was the innocent, good little girl caught up between fire-breathing monsters (read... ahem... well, you know how it is in offices!!!) and I was drowning in self-pity.

Although this reality hit me, I just could not stop my tirade. So I kept that going (since I started realizing, and I know women will agree with me, that I was feeling increasingly better and in control of my life, as I was sharing my problems with my girl-gang).

And it also dawned on me that gossip on genuine issues are mostly done to people who can't do anything about it, to right the situation. So I thought - what if I actually address the situation as opposed to just chattering on to somebody else. With such valiant thoughts in mind, I took the ahem... bull ... by its horns... and the rest is, well... food for more gossip but now, the heroic, 'I-never-knew-I-had-it-in-me--Way-to-go' gossip.

On a more serious note, can gossip be a form of expression and give peace of mind rather than spread grouse and negativity? When I look around, I guess very less of it is actually harmful, mean, putting-someone-else-down kind of gossip. Most of it is harmless, chit-chat-over coffee, a little grapevine over phone - more of people just talking to each other about each other - some masala on who is going steady with whom, what's going on, who's doing what...

And as far as the coffee-toffee debate on whether men gossip more than women, I think us women admit more easily to gossiping as compared to our male counterparts. And while they look down upon us women for forever gossiping about trivial things like clothes, accessories and boy-friends, they just try to take the higher ground in declaring that they are judicious in their words, talk less and gossip ever lesser. I beg to differ very strongly on this. My hubby is extremely curious to know exactly what's going on in my office; he'd know the names of all my peers and superiors, their spouses' names, where they work, who fought with whom, what is the latest scandal on, what did he tell her and then what did she tell her boss and then what did the boss do... its endless. And this is the same with all my guy-friends (and I have a HUGE gang of them).

... So, is there a man, man enough, to admit that he gossips... :)

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Life - In 4 Photographs!

Read this recently - HAD to share it...

First Pic :

Break of Dawn - New lease of life, embarking upon a New Voyage...
A Child Flying Kite - Young Blood, Aspiring to Fly High with Enormous Zest and Zeal... The sky is the limit...
A Small Tree - Need to Nurture...
Two Birds Hovering Above - There are the people around you to take care of you, nurture, nourish and protect you.

Second Pic

Daylight - You are almost half-way through the journey of Life
Couple - You have a better half with you to lean on and speak your heart out to.
Grown-up Tree - You have been nurtured to be able to stand tall and rigidly to face the storms which otherwise would have let you down.
Small Tree - You have brought a new life into the world
One bird hovering above - There are comparatively less people around you to take care of you, unlike the wonder years of your childhood.

Third Pic :

Fall of Dusk - Twilight is setting upon... Life has come a full circle.
An Old Man & Aging Tree - It is a race against time now... the beginning of the end of the journey...
Grown Tree - Your kids have grown up... it is time to set them free and support them with love and care rather than clashes.
One Bird - Self explanatory, I guess...
Grave - In the course of the journey, you have lost loved ones and you too start anticipating your ultimate fate and destiny...

Fourth Pic :

Nightfall - Journey has come to an end... Darkness is looming and it is time to bid aideu...
Starry Sky - There is still happiness around... thanks to the good work put in by you and your memories...
Grown-up Tree - Your children are walking in your shoes now; living their lives and drawing inspiration from your life...
Grave With Two Crosses - You are united with your soulmate... you now Rest In Peace...

Friday, March 13, 2009


I make my journey through eternity
I keep the memory of you and me inside

Fulfill your destiny,
Is there within the child,
My storm will never end,
My fate is on the wind,
The king of hearts, the joker's wild,
We don't say goodbye,
We don't say goodbye,
I'll make them all remember me

This is one of my favourite Celine Dion songs - Immortality.

Some things are immortal… Blogs, for example, keep you alive, long after you have gone... so do books you have authored, music you have written, movies you have made... lives you have touched.

It is such a beautiful way to stay connected with people, isn't it? After all, there is nothing so binding as shared experiences. Whether it is through our work or our craft, we touch so many lives and the moments just live on, long after you are gone. Today, when I read the books of authors long gone, I can still imagine the era they tried to capture in their writings, the magic they tried to weave in their words... when I listen to music, I picture in what moment of inspiration would such beautiful lyrics and tunes have got composed... when I read blogs, I can relive my life moments through the eyes and words of others - people who I've never met and yet share so much similarity with.

I think that is what we all are primarily here to do - spread smiles and cheer and become evergreen in the lives and hearts of as many people as we possibly can.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Ye Naam Mein Kya Rakha Hai...

Let's be clear about one thing from the very beginning - I love my name. It's unique - I work in a company which employees over 3 lakh employees and there are no employees with whom I share my complete name.

And then I got married - but happily, I didn't go through a name change. Although I think it is a matter of personal choice whether one should change one's name or not, here are my two bits and four pennies worth reasons why I think one should not be compelled to :

1. I love my name and I guess so do most women. It is a part of our identity and who we are. Does the identity of the bride remain in only her hubby's surname?

2. Why should the bride adopt her hubby's last name? or middle name? or any name other than what she has lived with for the last few years? Understand that she is married to you, but so are you to her. So why should only she make the transition?

3. There are so many times when I have gone through my facebook / orkut friend list and found that all of a sudden, the first name sounds familiar but the last name doesn't and if there are no snaps in the profile, I have to start making educated guesses about whether she is THE ONE I used to know in school / college!

4. I believe changing bank signatures, passports, driving licenses and other paraparnalia is a big pain, just because your in-laws / hubby want to address you by their name!

5. We get married today, more often than not, once we have already laid the foundation of our lives, have a career and earned financial independance and self-esteem. Is this the only way we need to prove our love / respect to our in-laws / hubbies?

... and finally, my name is my business. I am the only one who has the right to decide what it should be. It is simply a matter of personal choice. I may be someone who loves my maiden name or someone who would happily take up my hubby's surname because I love it / think it is MY way of showing love and respect for the family / I like to follow traditions... But, in a civilized society, I should not have to justify my choices to anyone. I should not have to explain why I retained my maiden name or changed it. That’s my business.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Tag Two...

Tagged by Amrita...

Here go the rules -
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you.

1. As a kid, I loved Enid Blytons - Famous Fives, The Enchanted Woods, St. Clare's and Secret Sevens... I had a huge collection of them and would never tire of reading the books repeatedly.

2. I love my dad - I inherited his love of being organized, systematic, - I learnt from him the art of prioritization, importance of time and his contagious laughter.

3. I love my mom - I learnt patience (whatever little of it I have), her sense of balance in life, the ability to multi-task and her sense of humour.

4. I love my bro - his is one guy I can hell discuss anything with... one of the most thanda guys around, he's been there with me every step... from the fights, masti, leg-pulling to serious discussions and decisions... I’d have never enjoyed the way I did without him...at every stage of my life...

5. I love my hubby - he's my partner in crime... my bestest friend... my biggest strength and my greatest weakness...I have learnt to be bubbly and cheerful, sensitive and understanding from him - I've found myself in him...

6. Music is an important part of my life.It can be anything - from rock to pop to bollywood numbers - but i must listen to music atleast for an hour each day.

7. In any situation, I try and figure out a million things which can go wrong and how I can handle them but what finally happens is invariably something I haven't thought about... Life is indeed beautiful!

8. I like a plan. I like direction. I like control.

9. I love long drives, milk chocolates, whites and blacks, babies, Calvin and Hobbes, Big B and Small B, winter mornings, rains, mists, sea breezes, hot coffees, sweet corn chicken soups, long chats with closest buddies!

10. I’d love to be a pilot - I love the feeling of defying gravity.

11. I love the war of words.

12. I love wit, humour and confidence to convince or confuse!

13. I believe that if I want something from the bottom of my heart, destiny will take care of the rest.

14. I believe the three things we crave most in life - happiness, freedom and peace of mind - are always attained by giving them to someone else.

15. I’m scared of loneliness.

16. I day-dream all the time.

17. I’m a self-confessed narcissist at times.

18. I want to live on the 14th floor of a sea-facing apartment so that I can feel the breeze in my hair at all times!

19. When I am not working, I am either reading science fiction or listening to music or playing scrabble or sleeping! (Not necessarily in that order!).

20. I try to give the other person the benefit of doubt most of the time. .

21. I am brutally honest about anything and try to be fanatically proud of whatever I do!

22. The main purpose of my life is to be happy and i'll do essentially whatever it takes, within the limits of my personal beliefs, to be happy.

23. I am a free spirit, always and forever.

24. I laugh openly... cry whenever I feel like and dance at every party or get-together.

25. I can’t wait for this stupid economic downturn to end - I hate the fact that I have to associate my work to my pay and hence park my other priorities, while the rest of the world figures its way out!

I tag - Neha, Rohit, Aqua-Girl, Sunshine, RK, Mohita, Akanksha, Ki, Anish, Rahul, Sawan, Indyeah, Phoenix, Mehreen, Purnima, S@M, Lena, Meera, Harshita, Kathryn, I am what I am, Dolphin, Samik, Akshat, NSI, DewMoonDrop, Me, Alok, and Scattered Thoughts and anyone else who wants to take it up!!!